Episode 64

full
Published on:

9th Dec 2024

WELCOME TO OUR KITCHEN: We're laughing about our career in food magazines!

Food magazines? Remember them? Sure, there are still a few around. But the print versions have certainly fallen off.

Back in the day, we had a long, full career with food magazines, including being contributing editors and columnists for some of the biggest. Do we have stories to tell!

We're Bruce Weinstein & Mark Scarbrough, authors of three dozen (and counting) cookbooks. We've written over ten thousand recipes for magazines. And we're so glad you're willing to share our passion for food and cooking!

Here are the segments for this episode of COOKING WITH BRUCE & MARK:

[00:54] Our one-minute cooking tip: Have the supermarket butcher unwrap shrink-wrapped meat to make sure it's still good.

[02:54] We're laughing through our stories about writing for food magazines!

[24:19] What’s making us happy in food this week? Our new cookbook that's out in the summer of 2025, as well as vintage port.

Transcript
Bruce:

Hey, I'm Bruce Weinstein, and this is the podcast

2

:

Cooking with Bruce and Mark.

3

:

And I'm Mark Scarborough, and

together with Bruce, we have

4

:

written so many cookbooks.

5

:

We've published, I don't know,

probably written tens, literally tens

6

:

of thousands of original recipes.

7

:

If not hundreds of thousands.

8

:

No, it's not that high, but

it's in the tens of thousands.

9

:

I used to keep track.

10

:

I don't even keep track anymore.

11

:

Um, we've had a long career, about

25 years in the food business,

12

:

and this is our podcast about

that passion, food and cooking.

13

:

We are so glad you've joined us.

14

:

We've got a one minute clip.

15

:

cooking tip up ahead.

16

:

We're going to talk about our career

in writing for food magazines,

17

:

something that has gone away.

18

:

Mostly food magazines.

19

:

Most of these are now gone by the

wayside, but we'll tell you some actually

20

:

funny stories from the two decades

in which we wrote for food magazines.

21

:

And then we'll tell you what's

making us happy in food this week.

22

:

So let's get started.

23

:

Our one minute cooking tip.

24

:

If you're buying meat at the supermarket

and it's pre wrapped, pre shrink wrapped,

25

:

not like it's been wrapped behind the

butcher counter, but you know they

26

:

brought it in shrink wrapped like the way

a turkey is or a duck or a leg of lamb.

27

:

Don't be afraid to ask the butcher

to open that package for you.

28

:

You want to make sure it smells good.

29

:

You know how many times I have brought

a leg of lamb home and opened it

30

:

and it smelled like rotted meat.

31

:

So if you ask them to open it and

it's good, they could just rewrap

32

:

it and put a price on it for you.

33

:

And you don't get home and

get stuck with some rotten.

34

:

Mark: Yeah, this particularly goes

for turkeys, as you say, for legs

35

:

of lamb, for those lamb shoulder

roasts that are prepackaged.

36

:

Oh, it happened with a

37

:

Bruce: rabbit once.

38

:

It was so nasty.

39

:

Mark: Yeah, it happened with a rabbit.

40

:

Not that, again, as Bruce says, not the

stuff that's sitting on the styrofoam

41

:

trays that's wrapped in the meat counter.

42

:

But if you know this thing came in

from afar, just ask them to unwrap it.

43

:

There's a butcher back there.

44

:

And they'll do it in a minute if they

don't want to go to another store.

45

:

Yeah.

46

:

And mostly they're

looking for things to do.

47

:

So just ask him to do it and

they'll be glad to do it.

48

:

And you can tell immediately if the thing

has gone off, don't waste your money.

49

:

All right.

50

:

Before we get to that next

segment of this podcast, let me

51

:

say that we do have a newsletter.

52

:

It comes out.

53

:

I don't know.

54

:

I used to say every two weeks, maybe

now once a month, because I'm in

55

:

the middle of the design of our next

book, which is out in July of:

56

:

So I, I haven't had a minute

to spare to write a newsletter.

57

:

But if you want to sign up for that

newsletter, which is not really connected

58

:

to this podcast, you can find how to

do so on our website, bruceandmark.

59

:

com or cookingwithbruceandmark.

60

:

com.

61

:

Scroll down the splash page or the landing

page that you'll see at the bottom,

62

:

a way to sign up for the newsletter.

63

:

Just to remind you, I don't collect

your email, nor do I allow the

64

:

provider MailChimp to collect it so

it can't be sold to other services.

65

:

You can always unsubscribe.

66

:

at any time.

67

:

We're happy to have you

along for the newsletter too.

68

:

Okay, let's tell some tales

about writing for food magazines.

69

:

I get to start.

70

:

Okay.

71

:

Um, so I want to talk about writing for

cooking light, which is now long gone.

72

:

Oh, we

73

:

Bruce: used to write so much for them.

74

:

Every issue we had a column.

75

:

Yeah.

76

:

We had a column in every issue, and

we got to write other features for

77

:

them, and it was a really, really nice

relationship we had, and we had a great

78

:

relationship with our editor there.

79

:

Mark: We did, and she was

a great editor to have.

80

:

She was very forthright and honest,

which is what you want in an editor.

81

:

She was very serious

about pitches as writers.

82

:

You want this, somebody who

looks over the pitches and goes

83

:

no or yes, which you don't want.

84

:

As a writer, in case you don't know

this, is you don't want equivocation,

85

:

or you don't want long delay, like

a month later, she hasn't even

86

:

said anything about your pitches.

87

:

For feature articles, you want somebody

who's, you know, back in a few days

88

:

and goes, nope, no thanks for all

of these, or yeah, this is great.

89

:

The third one looks good,

and let's talk about it.

90

:

That's what you want.

91

:

It's just a fast, easy response.

92

:

Bruce: And you have this relationship,

usually long distance, because

93

:

not everybody lives where you do.

94

:

I mean, we were in New York,

and you would think, oh, it's a

95

:

food magazine there in New York.

96

:

Nope.

97

:

Cooking Light was based in

98

:

Mark: Alabama.

99

:

Yeah.

100

:

Well, and I want to tell you before

we get to Cooking Light about

101

:

a little side point about this.

102

:

When I say that we pitched

magazines, this is is what we did.

103

:

Um, we were a contributing editor

for years to, uh, eating well,

104

:

but we still pitched the food

editor ideas for feature articles.

105

:

I mean, we had to come up with the

subject matter of the content and we

106

:

were out to dinner once with a very

prominent and snotty couple who wrote

107

:

cookbooks and food magazine articles.

108

:

And I was talking about this very thing.

109

:

And he, the man of this couple,

looked across the table.

110

:

at me with this withering look,

and he said, We do not pitch.

111

:

And I thought, Oh God, okay, great.

112

:

You're way more important than I am.

113

:

I still have to get an editor to

approve of what I'm gonna write.

114

:

But, okay, yes, that was us.

115

:

We did pitch.

116

:

So, we would pitch cooking a lot

of these stories, and one time we

117

:

were at the International Barbecue,

Expo in Atlanta and we drove over

118

:

to Cooking Light in Alabama, right?

119

:

Yeah.

120

:

And we drove over to where they

were and we met our editor.

121

:

Finally met her because we'd never, we'd

122

:

Bruce: only ever, you know, email.

123

:

Mark: You know, I was deathly

afraid of meeting her because,

124

:

you know, it's Cooking Light.

125

:

So I'm like, God, what are

we going to have for lunch?

126

:

I better have like celery or

a glass of water or something.

127

:

Half an aspirin.

128

:

And I was like, are you

129

:

Bruce: kidding?

130

:

She's going to take us to some,

you know, place where we're

131

:

going to be served a carrot.

132

:

Right, and I was like,

133

:

Mark: I don't want to fill

up on a whole aspirin.

134

:

Why don't you just give me a half of one?

135

:

Bruce: Instead this woman took us to Two

kind of two different barbecue restaurants

136

:

because she felt that the brisket and the

ribs she couldn't decide which were better

137

:

So we had to eat them all at both The

138

:

Mark (2): second restaurant part of going

to this two barbecue restaurants from

139

:

one lunch and the second restaurant for

cooking light The second restaurant it was

140

:

Mark: all going there also because they

had this giant cream cake and she wanted

141

:

to get a huge slice And eat it, and I was

like, okay, so much for my theory about

142

:

aspirins or carrots or celery or whatever.

143

:

So, what have

144

:

Mark (2): we learned today?

145

:

Mark: What have we learned

146

:

Mark (2): today is that, uh, the editors

at Cooking Light, they may have cooked

147

:

light, but they didn't eat light.

148

:

I was like, holy crow,

I can't eat two barbecue

149

:

Bruce: meals in one sitting.

150

:

That woman also loved her bourbon.

151

:

Mark (2): Yes, she did.

152

:

She

153

:

Bruce: did.

154

:

Loved her bourbon.

155

:

She did.

156

:

Mark: Um, for years, we

wrote for Wine Spectator.

157

:

In fact, you might consider that

really our first magazine gig

158

:

is writing for Wine Spectator.

159

:

And it was really a bit of a posh gig.

160

:

Oh, it was fabulous.

161

:

Because, uh, it was back in the day where

you had to be totally anonymous, and we

162

:

were writing food and travel articles for

them, and we had to do the whole thing

163

:

of just being absolutely under the radar.

164

:

We'll tell you about that in a minute.

165

:

And it was very old school.

166

:

This is so old school that in

writing for Wine Spectator, we

167

:

were given an expense account.

168

:

Bruce: Well, we had to pay for

all those meals we were reviewing.

169

:

But this is the best.

170

:

The funniest thing about, here we

are writing for Wine Spectator and

171

:

we did not get to write about wine.

172

:

Mark: No.

173

:

Bruce: We were disallowed

174

:

Mark: from writing about wine.

175

:

We weren't the wine experts, we

were the food and travel experts.

176

:

We weren't James Suckling and all these

really important people who raided wines.

177

:

And so, we had to write this.

178

:

these reviews, let's say that we did

this whole piece on the Vaucluse, this

179

:

region of France and we had to go to all

these beautiful restaurants with these

180

:

giant wine lists, oh I have to tell

you about it in a minute, with these

181

:

giant wine lists and then, you know,

we would review the meal that we ate

182

:

anonymously and stayed anonymously, paid

for it, paid for ourself, we couldn't,

183

:

you know, accept anything for free.

184

:

They didn't get to know who we were.

185

:

No, exactly.

186

:

Exactly.

187

:

And then.

188

:

Afterwards, I would reveal myself to them

and say, okay, this is who we are, but

189

:

this was a great, this article and you

know, I, I described the vocaloos and

190

:

the hotels and the restaurants and all

that, and then I literally had to leave

191

:

space in the article that says, you know,

copy about wine goes here because of

192

:

course they would look at the wine list.

193

:

And this is one of the things that

I think is so funny about writing

194

:

for spectator when we did it.

195

:

So we would, after.

196

:

eating dinner at a restaurant.

197

:

Then I would call them the

next day or drop by and I would

198

:

say, okay, here's the truth.

199

:

We were critics for Wine Spectator.

200

:

We're writing an article

about this region of France.

201

:

We'd like to include your restaurant.

202

:

And most importantly, what

I need is your wine list.

203

:

So I went.

204

:

to this one.

205

:

We went to this one restaurant, had a

spectacular meal in the south of France.

206

:

At the end of it, I asked, uh,

well, the next day, actually,

207

:

I asked for the wine list.

208

:

The wine list, just to tell you, it

was 175 pages long, 175 pages of wines.

209

:

And we were traveling and I wasn't going

to carry this thing around and they

210

:

didn't offer it to me anyway, right?

211

:

This is a fancy restaurant with like, Two

wine lists, you know, two copies of it.

212

:

So I asked her to fax it to us.

213

:

Remember fax machines?

214

:

Yes.

215

:

Remember the

216

:

Bruce: paper that rolled up?

217

:

So what happened?

218

:

So we got home after three weeks

of this trip, and the fax machine

219

:

was on my desk in the foyer of our

apartment, and there were hundreds

220

:

and hundreds of scrolled paper.

221

:

Out of order, out of

sequence, on the floor.

222

:

In that, that glisteny kind of pseudo

wet paper that fax machines would

223

:

Mark: spit out.

224

:

We had to pick them up

and put them in order.

225

:

And put them in order.

226

:

That was the

227

:

Mark (2): kicker.

228

:

Is it 175 pages?

229

:

Mark: And I was trying to figure

out, okay, wait, what's the And

230

:

it's not necessarily paginated.

231

:

So, I'm like, oh, my gosh,

how do I put this thing in

232

:

Bruce: order to give to my editor?

233

:

And when we went back to that place

to talk to them afterwards, to

234

:

actually talk to the chef, he was

like, oh, have a glass of champagne.

235

:

I'm like, no.

236

:

We can't even now, after the

fact, we cannot even have a

237

:

glass of champagne with you.

238

:

Absolutely nothing.

239

:

Which is why it was a little bizarre

when we wrote an article for Wine

240

:

Spectator about Austin, Texas.

241

:

Mmm.

242

:

Um, if you don't know me, if you

haven't heard enough stories about

243

:

me, I am always looking for a deal.

244

:

And a bargain.

245

:

And we were going to review these

hotels in Austin and restaurants,

246

:

and I wanted to stay at the Driscoll,

which is a really, really nice hotel.

247

:

Mark: Really old school hotel.

248

:

I mean, so old school in Austin, if

you don't know the history of Austin.

249

:

This is where LBJ, Lyndon Baines

Johnson, would hang out in the lobby

250

:

and essentially make legislative

deals when he was a state legislator,

251

:

and then even when he was a

congressman and a senator from Texas.

252

:

Bruce: You know, our expense account paid

for the nice meals, but it didn't really

253

:

allow us to stay in the best of hotels.

254

:

Mark: Well, okay, let me back up

and say, so Spectator put us on an

255

:

expense account, which is really

lovely, and it would have been a

256

:

generous expense account for one hotel.

257

:

person.

258

:

But there were the two of us.

259

:

We came as a pair.

260

:

So we had a split.

261

:

We took what one writer would get

back in the days of expense accounts.

262

:

And then we had to get a double room.

263

:

We had to eat twice as

much food, all that kind of

264

:

Bruce: stuff in the

265

:

Mark: restaurant.

266

:

Bruce: So I called the marketing

director at the Driscoll.

267

:

And I said, look, here's the deal, Mark

and I are going to be writing an article

268

:

in Austin for Wine Spectator and I

want to stay at the Driscoll, which was

269

:

breaking the rules immediately there,

and I asked him what kind of deal he

270

:

could give me, and he ended up saying,

you know, he gave me a really good deal

271

:

on this room, and we ended up showing

up at the hotel, and basically that Good

272

:

deal, which I thought was per night.

273

:

He was only charging us for the whole

stay, and he was including dinner.

274

:

Like, 99 bucks for like for

three nights, three or four

275

:

nights, plus one night dinner.

276

:

And it was going to be a

big tasting menu dinner.

277

:

And

278

:

Mark: mind you, here's

how unethical this is.

279

:

He's charging us 99 for four nights.

280

:

And yes, we're going to eat in his

restaurant one night, but we're going

281

:

to go to other Austin restaurants.

282

:

So we're staying on his dime to

review other restaurants in Austin.

283

:

Oh, it was terrible.

284

:

So.

285

:

Uh, we weren't married yet, but

we had a relationship loudness

286

:

over this when I got there.

287

:

So

288

:

Bruce: we go down to the dining

room now, and usually this is

289

:

supposed to be anonymous, right?

290

:

The chefs don't have to know who we are.

291

:

And I told him the chef

may not know who we are.

292

:

Of course, he said, no, no problem.

293

:

I will keep you anonymous.

294

:

At our table was a little

sign that says the Driscoll.

295

:

Welcomes

296

:

Mark: Wine Spectator.

297

:

So, right, you're supposed to be

anonymous, like the old days with

298

:

Ruth Reichel, when she would, like,

put on the wigs and the dresses,

299

:

and nobody would know who she was

dining in New York restaurants.

300

:

Okay, it's supposed to be like that.

301

:

Not quite that bad, because we're not

a known quantity like Ruth Reichel was.

302

:

But still, we're supposed to be totally

anonymous, and there on the table was

303

:

this thing, uh, just glowed, a Welcomes

Wine Spectator, and I was like, Oh my God!

304

:

Oh, my God, we're going

to be fired from this

305

:

Bruce: gig.

306

:

The chef comes out.

307

:

And by the way, the head chef

was off that night, but I brought

308

:

him in just to cook for us.

309

:

And he had planned a

12 course menu for us.

310

:

Now, if you've listened to us talk

before, there are certain things

311

:

I don't like to eat and don't eat.

312

:

And so I told him things I don't eat.

313

:

He just freaked out.

314

:

He ran, he thought it was a test.

315

:

He ran back to the kitchen

and they had to rethink it.

316

:

And it was a fabulous meal.

317

:

And luckily we kind of kept

it as honest as we could.

318

:

We did.

319

:

Mark: We wrote about it in Spectator.

320

:

But now even this many years

later, this is like 20 years later.

321

:

No, 25 years later, I'm still

just super embarrassed by it.

322

:

It just makes me cringe inside.

323

:

It was, it was a great gig with Spectator.

324

:

It was.

325

:

But, uh, we were definitely

the non cool kids on the block.

326

:

Oh, I have to tell you

this about Spectator.

327

:

They had their big offices in

New York City and the, uh, Marvin

328

:

Shakin owned Wine Spectator.

329

:

He owns Cigar Aficionado, several of

these really high end magazines and

330

:

at the time, and so we went up to the

offices and you walked into the Wine

331

:

Spectator offices and there was this

giant glassed in wine cellar and like an.

332

:

Idiot Rube from Texas, which I probably

am an idiot Rube from Texas I walk

333

:

up to the glass wine cellar and I

look down and I see this bottle of

334

:

like 1889 Bordeaux literally like

:

335

:

to my editor and say is that real?

336

:

Yeah, cuz they're gonna

have a fake bottle there.

337

:

It's like a wine spectator.

338

:

It was so Overwhelming.

339

:

I thought, wait, what?

340

:

What is this?

341

:

This cellar of wine that's in the, in

the reception area of Wine Spectator.

342

:

Yeah,

343

:

Bruce: I will say that when we

came up with ideas and we pitched

344

:

our editor at Wine Spectator for

articles, it was actually a lot of fun.

345

:

And it was It's easier than pitching

food magazines because food magazines,

346

:

you're thinking about, okay, let's do an

article on turkey leftovers, or let's do

347

:

an article of what to do with cranberries

or something, you know, really weird.

348

:

For instance, with fine cooking once

we had written a ham book and we said,

349

:

let's do a ham thing and let's replace

turkeys at the holiday with ham.

350

:

And they did an article where they

recreated the Norman Rockwell painting

351

:

freedom from want where the mom is

putting the turkey down on the table.

352

:

That was me.

353

:

The mom.

354

:

And then I was there to carve

it, and it was like him.

355

:

Precious is the dad.

356

:

Yeah, well, what are you gonna do?

357

:

So those, it's very different when

we were pitching for Spectator,

358

:

so we had this brilliant idea.

359

:

Look at a place like Cannes, you know,

it's a fancy resort place in France.

360

:

It's a fancy resort.

361

:

What is it like without the festival?

362

:

What, what is a city like?

363

:

What's Cannes without the film festival?

364

:

What is it without the festival?

365

:

Are the restaurants still there?

366

:

Are they still good?

367

:

Well, they are, but what are they doing?

368

:

Are they, what are they doing?

369

:

Are they still up to game?

370

:

So we pitched that and we wrote a

piece on Cannes without the festival.

371

:

And that whole problem of two

of us and one expense account

372

:

reared its ugly head, didn't it?

373

:

Mark: Yes, we could afford to eat

in the really high end restaurants

374

:

we were expected to eat in.

375

:

I mean, we're expected to eat in

two and three Michelin starred

376

:

restaurants for these articles.

377

:

So, really high end.

378

:

You're spending a ton of money on dinner.

379

:

And we were expected to

order really nice wine.

380

:

We had to show the bills

that we had bought.

381

:

Really nice bottles of wine.

382

:

Even though we couldn't write about it.

383

:

Even though we couldn't

write about the wine.

384

:

We had to show the bills

that we had bought.

385

:

Um, our editor preferred it when we

bought two bottles of expensive wine.

386

:

So there you go.

387

:

So we had to do all of that, but given

that there were two of us eating in these

388

:

really high end places, the budget was

eaten up and we couldn't afford a hotel.

389

:

So we paid for a hotel out of our

fee, not our expense account, our fee.

390

:

And so of course we tried to

find a really cheap hotel.

391

:

And

392

:

Bruce: we did.

393

:

There are cheap hotels in Cannes.

394

:

Did you know that?

395

:

Oh my god, like a

396

:

Mark: hotel so cheap I

wouldn't have stayed there as

397

:

a traveling college student,

398

:

Bruce: so come on.

399

:

No, a hotel where you're going to sleep in

your clothes and shower in your sneakers.

400

:

And it was above some Moroccan nightclub.

401

:

It was.

402

:

And I could swear they were slaughtering

a camel every night down there.

403

:

Mark: There were always these gangs

of motorcycle guys, guys on really

404

:

loud motorcycles, on the middle of the

night, whipping away from this bar,

405

:

and I always referred to them as the

Prince of Morocco and his entourage,

406

:

because I'm like, what is going on down

407

:

Bruce: there?

408

:

Loud music banging up in our

409

:

room.

410

:

Bruce: So the dichotomy of going

to these three star restaurants and

411

:

eating like princes and then going

back to this disgusting no star hovel.

412

:

Mark: We went to this one

restaurant once for a spectator

413

:

in, uh, nearby Aix en Provence.

414

:

And so we're in Aix and,

uh, well, outside of it.

415

:

And it's this country

restaurant out in the country.

416

:

don't think really people

intend to stay here.

417

:

It is one of these restaurant with

rooms in France where there's a, you

418

:

know, a fancy restaurant and they

have a few rooms where if you want to

419

:

stay the night, you can't put the word

420

:

Bruce: rooms

421

:

Mark: in quotes.

422

:

Yeah, but I don't think

most people really do that.

423

:

They take a limo from aches or wherever

out to this restaurant and back again.

424

:

Okay.

425

:

But we didn't cause when, you know,

again, two people, one expense account.

426

:

So we stayed in the rooms of

this really fancy restaurant.

427

:

And let me just say that I.

428

:

opened the door, the room was cinder

blocks, painted white cinder blocks, and

429

:

there were filled, completely filled, fly

strips hanging all over from the ceiling.

430

:

If you're not familiar with that,

431

:

Bruce: those are those sticky yellow

tape that comes out of the canister

432

:

that hangs on the ceiling and flies get

433

:

Mark: stuck to it.

434

:

We were stuck here, we like the flies,

we were stuck here because we were

435

:

writing at the restaurant, so we had

to go to dinner and spend the night.

436

:

And eat dinner, but I was stuck

in this room where literally

437

:

I showered in my sneakers.

438

:

Yeah, it was disgusting.

439

:

I kept my tennis shoes on and

showered because I refused to put bare

440

:

feet on the tiles of the bathroom.

441

:

Can you believe this?

442

:

That you spend, I don't know, you spend

400 euros for dinner, 500 euros for

443

:

dinner, and yet the room is so disgusting.

444

:

You're showering in your sneakers.

445

:

Oh God, it was con all over again.

446

:

It was.

447

:

So.

448

:

We're going to tell you a

couple of stories here at the

449

:

end about the New York Times.

450

:

Now, you know the New York Times fancies

itself a serious place of journalism,

451

:

but let me tell you, in our experience

of writing for the New York Times, it

452

:

is hardly a serious place of journalism.

453

:

Instead, it was a place of really

weird and far out gimmicks.

454

:

So once the New York Times

came up with the story, which

455

:

actually, we didn't pitch.

456

:

Oh, see?

457

:

No, they came to us.

458

:

We don't pitch.

459

:

So

460

:

Bruce: here's their idea.

461

:

They said, so we have decided to ask

a bunch of famous bestselling authors

462

:

to give us a paragraph, to write us a

paragraph that says the scene, and we

463

:

would like you, Bruce and Mark, to come

up with a drink that would be served

464

:

in that scene, or that that scene is

talking about, and we will photograph it.

465

:

It's not

466

:

Mark: the cheesiest

idea you've ever heard.

467

:

So the first, I'm going to read it,

and Bruce can tell you what he made.

468

:

So, for example, they They picked people

like Jackie Collins, and they, they said,

469

:

Okay, Jackie Collins is gonna write a

little paragraph scene, and then you have

470

:

to make a cocktail that fits this scene.

471

:

That was the assignment.

472

:

Let me read you the Jackie Collins bit.

473

:

Lucky Santagelo, a strikingly beautiful

woman with wild black hair, olive

474

:

skin, and eyes darker than night,

strode into the Manhattan bar for

475

:

her meeting with Silvio Mancotta.

476

:

Ha, she thought.

477

:

Does this poor excuse for a mob boss

really imagine he can get one over on me?

478

:

No way!

479

:

She smiled at the barman and he nodded

back, the usual Miss Santangelo.

480

:

Absolutely,

481

:

Bruce: she replied.

482

:

That's the paragraph.

483

:

What he made her, in our opinion,

we called it a sweet revenge.

484

:

An ounce of grappa.

485

:

Topped by a teaspoon of Sambuca

and a teaspoon of creme de cassis.

486

:

I don't know.

487

:

Why

488

:

Mark: not?

489

:

It's

490

:

Bruce: the

491

:

Mark: Serious New York

Times that is doing this.

492

:

Tamma Janowitz, which she

wrote for this same assignment.

493

:

Ready?

494

:

It was a party of people pretending.

495

:

The host, A nebbishy guy

from Queens, what, nebbishy?

496

:

Okay, alright, alright, you gotta be

from New York to know what that means.

497

:

The host, a nebbishy guy from

Queens, had for years pretended to

498

:

be from an old New England family.

499

:

There was an artist, very, who was

actually too terrified to paint a

500

:

stroke unless he had his assistant

standing behind him saying yes or no.

501

:

A blonde.

502

:

Who was really a brunette.

503

:

And an English aristocrat who

had spent years pretending he

504

:

was a tough guy from the slums.

505

:

Otherwise, no one would take

him seriously as an actor.

506

:

Even the drinks, shocking pink

martinis with the fragrant tang of

507

:

pomegranate packed a lethal bite.

508

:

But who cared really?

509

:

It was all such delicious pretend fun.

510

:

Okay, that is the most overwritten

piece of junk I've read in a long time.

511

:

A blonde who is really a brunette.

512

:

You know what?

513

:

I'm going back to Henry James.

514

:

Mark (2): But, um, what drink did you

come up for this with the pink pants?

515

:

Well, I decided that

516

:

Bruce: that pink drink

was called Pink Panties.

517

:

That was the shockingly pink

518

:

Mark (2): martini.

519

:

And

520

:

Bruce: it was an ounce of

Absolute Courant, which is that

521

:

black currant flavored vodka.

522

:

Half ounce of Cointreau.

523

:

A little bit of lime juice.

524

:

And topped with a splash

of pomegranate juice.

525

:

There you are.

526

:

And I'm sure it serves you up, right?

527

:

Like a martini.

528

:

Well, yeah, like a Cosmo.

529

:

Yeah.

530

:

That's sort of more like a Cosmo.

531

:

Oh, God.

532

:

Now, can I tell you one more

533

:

Mark: story?

534

:

Sure.

535

:

So, we had to go to the photo shoot for

these drinks for the New York Times.

536

:

We had to show up and we were

going to style the drinks.

537

:

So, they had all their

props and all that stuff.

538

:

But, really, what Bruce had

to do was make the drinks.

539

:

So, we got to this one, which would

Bruce had titled Pink Panties, and, you

540

:

know, I thought, well, this photographer

was there, and I was there, and I said

541

:

to him, well, what if we put a pair

of pink women's panties in the shot

542

:

with the drink, right, next to it?

543

:

That's the New York Times.

544

:

That's the New York Times, right?

545

:

So, uh, he looked The photographer,

but he, he was this old Russian

546

:

man and he agreed to it.

547

:

So we, he went to the prop room

somewhere and found, believe it

548

:

or not, some pink women's panties.

549

:

My question, were those part of the

props or did someone leave them?

550

:

I don't know.

551

:

These are huge prop rooms

from fashion shoots.

552

:

There's everything here.

553

:

So he finds a pair of pink panties.

554

:

We put them on the set.

555

:

We take the photograph.

556

:

And at this point, the editor walks

in, the New York Times editor walks in.

557

:

He absolutely freaks out because why?

558

:

This is a serious newspaper.

559

:

We do serious journalism.

560

:

We're not

561

:

Bruce: gonna have women's

panties in a shot.

562

:

I'm like, dude, no, but you're

gonna print the Tamma Janowitz.

563

:

You're asking paragraph

564

:

Mark (2): Tamma Janowitz and Jackie

Collins to write crappy paragraphs and

565

:

make drinks up to go with them, and

you're offended at a pair of pink panties.

566

:

Okay?

567

:

Yeah.

568

:

Take your seriousness

where you need to take it

569

:

Mark: and do with it what you need to do.

570

:

Absolutely lost it.

571

:

In fact, I think he's so lost

it with Oz that that was the

572

:

last time we ever wrote for him.

573

:

It was the last time.

574

:

I think I had stepped over

a line by suggesting actual

575

:

pink panties in the shot.

576

:

And then fighting him on it.

577

:

Well, no, I really fight him.

578

:

We just, we're done like we'd taken it

and you know, listen, this photographer,

579

:

I'm sure they're paying him by the second.

580

:

And so he spent time setting up the shot

and taking it and then they can't use it.

581

:

So he's irritated.

582

:

The editor is irritated at me and

also believes that I don't understand

583

:

the gravity of the New York times.

584

:

So, you know, I mean,

it's the whole thing.

585

:

thing.

586

:

But listen, how can you be gravitated

if you've got Jackie Collins and

587

:

Tamma Janowitz writing for you?

588

:

I don't know.

589

:

Anyway.

590

:

So those were our stories about

writing for various food magazines.

591

:

We've got lots more that we can

tell you if you're interested.

592

:

There's so much to say.

593

:

But before we get to the last segment

of this podcast, let me say it would

594

:

be great if you could rate this

podcast or if you could write a review.

595

:

We're unsupported, as you know, and

some of the platforms like Apple

596

:

Podcasts allows you to write reviews.

597

:

So if you could do that,

that'd be a spectacular thing.

598

:

that you can support our

otherwise unsupported podcast.

599

:

So let's talk about what's making

us happy in food this week.

600

:

I can start.

601

:

I, one of the things that made me happy

is as you've probably heard, I am dealing

602

:

with our new book in layout and design.

603

:

And that means the designer

has put it into page format.

604

:

It now looks like it's

going to be printed.

605

:

I have a huge printout.

606

:

of it.

607

:

I'm not going to tell you

what the book is about yet.

608

:

I'm holding it in abeyance, but I can

tell you this is probably the most

609

:

beautiful book we have ever produced.

610

:

The designer did a spectacular

job laying it out on the page.

611

:

It looks, as they say in the

industry, built, meaning that it

612

:

looks like a book that has some

kind of heft and weight to it.

613

:

The photography is

gorgeous from Eric Metzger.

614

:

I'm just dumbfounded as I'm going

through this book, and it's making me

615

:

very happy because, you know, we've

written a lot of books in our career,

616

:

and some of them we wrote because they

fit the market, like Instant Pop books.

617

:

No shine on those books, but we were

catching a trend as it was happening.

618

:

This book, we're not catching a trend.

619

:

We're actually writing something we

want to write about, and I'm so happy

620

:

that the chance we got to write about

something we want to write about has

621

:

ended up looking so beautiful on the page.

622

:

It's just kind of undoing

me, and it's just to say.

623

:

It takes a giant, giant horde of people

to make a book, not just authors.

624

:

It takes designers and editors and

managing editors and traffickers and

625

:

jacket designers and font negotiators, and

it takes a lot of people to create a book.

626

:

So this one is kind of special,

and it's making me very happy.

627

:

Okay.

628

:

What's

629

:

Bruce: making me happy is a port, a

vintage port from:

630

:

It was a gift from our literary agent.

631

:

And we've cellared it for a couple

of years and finally opened it

632

:

with friends the other night.

633

:

And it was so raisiny and molasses

y and grape y and rich and it

634

:

tasted like the best jam with

the best wine and dried fruit.

635

:

And It was an amazing port

and that was making me happy.

636

:

Mark: It was really crazy.

637

:

Even the Brit at the table was

impressed by the port, which is,

638

:

is, uh, quite an accomplishment.

639

:

So that's the podcast for this week.

640

:

Thanks for being on this journey with us.

641

:

Thanks for spending time with us.

642

:

We appreciate it that you have chosen

this podcast to listen to among

643

:

the many about food and cooking

on all of the web's airwaves.

644

:

Bruce: And every week we tell you

what's Making us happy in food.

645

:

So please go to our Facebook

group, Cooking with Bruce and

646

:

Mark, and share with us there.

647

:

What is making you

happy in food this week?

648

:

Because we want to know on

Cooking with Bruce and Mark.

Show artwork for Cooking with Bruce and Mark

About the Podcast

Cooking with Bruce and Mark
Fantastic recipes, culinary science, a little judgment, hysterical banter, love and laughs--you know, life.
Join us, Bruce Weinstein and Mark Scarbrough, for weekly episodes all about food, cooking, recipes, and maybe a little marital strife on air. After writing thirty-six cookbooks, we've got countless opinions and ideas on ingredients, recipes, the nature of the cookbook-writing business, and much more. If you've got a passion for food, we also hope to up your game once and a while and to make you laugh most of the time. Come along for the ride! There's plenty of room!

About your host

Profile picture for Mark Scarbrough

Mark Scarbrough

Former lit professor, current cookbook writer, creator of two podcasts, writer of thirty-five (and counting) cookbooks, author of one memoir (coming soon!), married to a chef (my cookbook co-writer, Bruce Weinstein), and with him, the owner of two collies, all in a very rural spot in New England. My life's full and I'm up for more challenges!